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Fake PETA Protester Celebrates D’Artagnan Anniversaire | Village Voice


Fake PETA Protester Celebrates D’Artagnan Anniversaire


Several hundred merry eaters-and-drinkers celebrated D’Artagnan’s 25th anniversary at Guastavino’s last night. For the last quarter-century, the company has peddled French-style pate, game, meat, and charcuterie. Costumes were encouraged, and so there were red devils, musketeers, and football players munching pate de campagne, coq au vin, venison osso bucco, and cassoulet. Someone who looked an awful lot like Ming Tsai bobbed for prunes in Armagnac, and Gael Greene wore a jaunty red sailor’s cap. And then something strange happened.

A young, dark haired man appeared with a sign that read, “Animals have feelings.” D’Artagnan has been the focus of foie gras protests in the past, so it didn’t seem too far fetched that animal rights activists had crashed the party. The fellow circled around holding up his sign for a while, until a security guard approached with a barrel chest and a neck wider than a model’s waist. An awkward silence fell among the guests that could see the action. “You’re going to have to go,” the guard said, placing one meaty hand on the protester’s shoulder. A guy with a video camera was filming the scene. “Why are you here?” he asked the protester.

“Because you guys kill so many animals, I cry every single night into my hemp pillow,” he replied.

Wait a minute….

Suddenly the protester whipped out a pennant emblazoned with the word “bacon.” The crowd breathed. Good costume. “I thought the security guard was kidding at first,” said the would-be Peta member later, who turned out to work for D’Artagnan. “But then he said I was going to have to go, and I realized he was serious.”

The peril past, two women performed a fencing duel, and the line for the pate table grew even longer.


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