Pajama Jeans: Pants to Hide Your White-Trash Lifestyle — But Only from a Distance


Pajama Jeans: They’re a blanket with holes for your legs! If pants and a Snuggie got together, their socially unacceptable fleece love child would look a hell of a lot like these actual pants that’ve been making the interweb rounds. Made of a cotton-spandex blend dubbed “Dormisoft,” the not-yet “Seen on TV” Pajama Jeans are touted as the, er, chic alternative to sweatpants, which apparently is sweat pants with drawn-on fake denim details. As demonstrated by the Snuggie-esque infomercial, they allow you to do all sorts of activities you could never do in normal pants, like walking, standing next to a bike, and awkward leg petting. For only $39.95, you too can not look like white trash — but only from a distance.

If the dark wash, boot-cut style of Pajama Jeans isn’t quite up to par for your next trip to Wal-Mart, try the cheaper impostor brand Jeans Lounge Pants ($19.95), available on real website Unfortunately, this lightwash variety (with a classy asymmetrical ripped-knee detailing) doesn’t come with Pajama Jeans’ bonus item: a free gray T-shirt, in case you’ve been wearing a Snuggie so long you no longer own clothes. Fashion Week seems very far away.