So this was going to be a post about The Runaways movie, and how we’re seeing it on opening day and you can’t stop us, but then we got to wondering what former real-life guitarist Lita Ford was up to, and here you have it: she’s been busy breeding a mohawked mini-fighter.
In the years since Ford shacked up with Nikki Sixx and emoted beside Ozzy Osbourne, the now-51-year-old metal goddess married fellow headbanger James Gillette, frontman for the truly godawful late-’80s hair-in-finger-socket-metal band Nitro (even hated them then as a kid hesher), and they grew a couple of babies. The younger of those two bantlings, eight-year-old Rocco, has supposedly taken jui jitsu since he was two (Metal Sludge is the source here [cough]), but now he’s most certainly pummeling poor unsuspecting little boys in the boxing ring, much to his parents’ joy.
Ford and her husband, whose face has basically exploded since his “Night Train” days, is so proud of Rocco’s fighting skills that earlier this month, she posted a hand-cam video of his first amateur match on her MySpace page (along with such past accomplishments as the video for “Close My Eyes Forever”) and it is something to behold. Rocco, who could be mistaken for a girl due to the long, shaggy tail hanging out the back of his boxing helmet, wails on his tiny opponent so relentlessly that this clip should either be on America’s Funniest Home Videos or a scene from a Noah Baumbach film. Pretty sure the other child, who was probably raised on Coldplay, doesn’t even get in a punch.
After two mini-bouts, the referee calls the match, thankfully, and as her son climbs down from the ring, Lita Ford congratulates him from behind the camera with, “Alright, DUDE!” DUDE is right.