Now, leaving aside the semantics of the “Free ____” meme, let’s just review here for a second. Back in November, word of a scheduled appearance by the young Island Def Jam signee and Usher protégé Justin Bieber at Long Island’s Roosevelt Field Mall resulted in a stampede that shattered the arm of one chaperone and drew blood from several others. First the cops threatened to arrest Bieber; then they settled for arresting Island Def Jam Senior Vice President James Roppo for the legally baffling crime of failing to announce on his Twitter account that the signing had been cancelled. Next up to face those same charges? Scott “Scooter” Braun, Bieber’s manager, who allegedly waited nearly two hours to warn fans off via Twitter and is now facing up to a year on charges of reckless endangerment. Hence: #FreeScooter, currently tearing up the accounts of Twittering teenagers all across this country.
Which is ridiculous. Scooter Braun, of course, is also Asher Roth’s manager, which means he’s indirectly responsible for at least one other major Twitter-related fuck-up in the last year, e.g. the time Roth tweeted about hanging out with “nappy headed hoes” and thereby got banned from the most prominent rap-related website on the Internet. Braun “discovered” Roth after the burgeoning white rapper sent him a MySpace friend request; that’s also how Braun scooped up Bieber, which suggests that he’s both one of the laziest A&Rs out and also that he has an inexplicable passion for young white dudes in white t-shirts and blue hoodies. Either way, we can probably rest assured dude does in fact know how to use Twitter, to say nothing of his long experience and success with sending teenage girls into a stampeding frenzy. Which is to say he’s not exactly Lil Wayne getting sent up by hip-hop cops, or Gucci Mane, who violated his parole. Mess with the women of Long Island and they will mess with you back. That’s just a fact. So remember, Scooter–there’s only two days you do in prison. The day you go in, and the day you come out. Maybe Asher Roth will even have some seared foie gras waiting for you when you get home.
Manager of Justin Bieber Is Arrested [ArtsBeat]