My favorite things to eat all day and night are bread, bagels, pasta, rice, and potatoes.
All the starchiest things in the world, all filled with SHITLOADS of carbs.
I did some research and found that these foods are actually lower in fat than most other types of edibles, shockingly enough.
But I guess if you eat piles of them all day, all with high-fat toppings drizzled all over them, they cease to be such a dietetic delight.
I’m starting to look like something out of Precious.
And I have carb face!
Please help me stop this addiction. And don’t even think of suggesting salads!