What Do LL Cool J and Sarah Palin Have In Common?


If you answered, “They both got lyrical beatdowns from Canibus in 1998,” well, not quite — if only because we can’t confirm it. If you answered, “Brooklyn thinks they’re just punchlines,” close, but no cigar. Every borough has Wrong People, even Brooklyn, sparse as they may be. If you answered, “They both have an incredible ability to make money and cling to fame long after the public consensus that they’re both totally washed up emerges, and that a career playing out old hits is, for the two of them, sadder than sad, and what T.S. Eliot once described as ‘going out with a whimper,’ ” you missed it by a hair. And if you went with, “Children whose existence they’ve tried to cover up for,” LL has yet to yield any — so, no. The answer?

According to Steve Krakauer at Mediaite, they’re both going to be appearing on the first episode of Palin’s new Fox News gig, Real American Stories, tomorrow night. Steve’s report opens with the following:

This is not an April Fool’s joke.

And…yeah. Other guests guests include Toby Keith and former GE chairman Jack Welch.

Well, Queens, you produced a “Real American Story.”

Mama Said Knock You Out. Of Your Misery. LL’s Queens diplomacy status? Knocked down a peg. Or nine. If you actually need to understand why this is, or how this is, then you’ve probably never heard of LL Cool J in the first place. In which case, I’d apologize, but at this point, you’re clearly better off.

In memory: LL Cool J’s remaining borough-bred rapper cred for Queens.

1985 – 2010.