New York

What if Hitler had to go to NYPD Compstat?


Some genius has come up with a new spoof of the Hitler film Downfall, in which Der Fuhrer is cast as a precinct commander forced to go get his head handed to him at one of the NYPD’s Compstat meetings. (Compstat, for the uninitiated, is a monthly meeting where precinct commanders are closely questioned on their statistics.)

Pretty hilarious, especially if you’re a cop who has to run around all day writing summonses, doing community visits and stopping and frisking folks just to hit some unwritten quota in order to make the Boss look good down at 1 Police Plaza.

Favorite lines:
“Nobody is going home on time tonight!”
“And do I complain that you guys couldn’t find your ass with two hands and a map?”
“Once again I’ll go downtown and throw myself on the sword for YOUR stupidity.”
“It looks like nobody is going to get to go to the holiday party this year.”
“If they add any more steps to a grand larceny, I’m going to shoot one of you in the face. In. The. Face.”
“Somebody get me to the pension section.”


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