Reader Rick Shur notes that an April 1st prank poster about extreme subway security measures, put up on the 110th Street downtown #1 subway wall, is still there!
And the satirical poster involves all kinds of intrusive, invasive body searches that Homeland Security is allowed to do on passengers in the name of safety.
Hmm. I’m gonna head on up to 110th Street and hope it’s not a prank.
New Security Measures for all NYC MTA Subway and Bus Riders
Effective immediately, all passengers utilizing public transportation in the New York City mass transit system will be subject to the following security measures deemed appropriate for the maintenance and operation of a safe, uninterrupted execution of the public utility:
- Random searches of large bags and backpacks will continue.
- Additional personal searches may be required on a case by case basis. Pat downs and clothing pocket searches will be administered by officers of the New York City Police Department whenever such officers deem that a possible threat of auto explosive detonation is imminent or possibly imminent.
- Small children may be dusted to determine if they have been exposed to any inflammatory or explosive chemicals.
- Adult persons may be subject to random search of body cavities, to be conducted by members of the New York City Department of Health, in rooms designated by MTA authorities as Homeland Security personal search rooms. An officer of the New York City Police Department will observe all such body cavity searches and will document the search with designated official New York City Police Department video technicians who will be of the same gender as the person to be searched. The video tape of the search will remain in police custody and will not be disseminated to any agency, public or private, for viewing by persons not designated by the Department of Homeland Security or the New York City Police Department.
- A personal body cavity search may be refused by an MTA passenger, but such passenger will not be allowed to utilize mass transit at the station or stop where the search was to be conducted.
- If a body cavity search results in the detection of any suspicious material, the person will be subject to immediate arrest by the New York City Police Department or the United States Department of Homeland Security and such person will be released if the substance is found to have no strategic military value. If substances are non-explosive but otherwise controlled substances according to TITLE 21/CHAPTER 13 of the DRUG ABUSE PREVENTION AND CONTROL ACT, then officers will confiscate such substances and release the person with a warning.
- If substances found by duly authorized search agents have non-explosive but inebriative value, such agents may utilize such substances at designated social functions for members of the New York City Police Department or the United States Department of Homeland Security, and members of their family.