Lessons in Irony: Darwin Family Not Quite Hip to That Whole Darwinism Thing


This is ironic: Studies are now suggesting that Charles Darwin’s family suffered from a rash of birth and growth defects. Because of inbreeding. Like, serious inbreeding. Like, he was schtupping his first cousin. Via Yahoo/LiveScience:

Darwin wondered in his own lifetime if his marriage to first cousin Emma Wedgwood was having “the evil effects of close interbreeding” that he had observed in plants and animals.

Not only that, but Darwin’s mom was a Wedgwood, Darwin’s grandfather was a Wedgwood, and his mom’s parents were third cousins. Maybe a good hint for Darwin to chill on the whole Doing Your Cousin Thing might’ve come when three Darwin kids died before they reached the age of ten, at which point, it was too late. From the Darwin kids who didn’t die, only half of their marriages produced children.

So, basically, the next time you find yourself writing studies that will change the way much of humanity will view the reasons behind its existence, make sure to test it out on yourself, first. Also, if the only girl you can get is your cousin, something is wrong. That should be a telling sign, right? The point is OMG DARWIN THE FATHER OF EVOLUTIONARY THEORY TOTALLY DID HIS COUSIN EW. Also, if he’s the father of Evolutionary Theory, what’s that make Evolutionary Theory?