“Furburger” OK to Say in Sex Ed, Declares Judge


Faith Kramer, a 26-year teacher in Staten Island, has won the right to sue the New York City Department of Education, which suspended her and put her in a rubber room after parents complained she’d used words like “furburger,” “schmeckle,” and “blow job” to teach her sex ed/HIV/AIDS class, reports the New York Post.

The Brooklyn judge who found in Kramer’s favor said that the Board of Ed never told teachers to use “Latinism of the academy, excluding vulgarism of the street” while teaching class — and if they want that, well, they should say so. Fuck yeah.

But beyond the transparency argument there’s a question of semantics. If you really want to compare/contrast the alleged dirtiness of certain words, for example, “cunnilingus” (derived from Latin), is way nastier-sounding than the wholesome American “go down on.” And no one can deny that “fellatio” has a certain deviant ring to it. Conversely, “furburger” is almost cute, if you don’t think about it too much.

Typical parents, getting freaky about the small stuff when what really matters is that the kids are learning how to practice hide the pickle safely — once they’re ready of course.

Hey, we appreciate using a variety of words to creatively convey what others fall back on saying all too repetitively … even if it does mean that generations are growing up to speak Harold and Kumar.

Bring on the 100 percent all-beef thermometer.