Okay, we’re all pretty depressed about the BP spill and how many species of living things
we that dastardly company is likely contributing to the extinction of. But sadness never cleaned up any oil, and if you frown too long your face will probably stay that way, so let’s take a moment to appreciate the “Top 10 New Species of 2010,” as identified by the International Institute for Species Exploration at Arizona State University.
Now, they may not be pelicans or turtles or delicious tuna, but their mothers consider them quite beautiful, we are certain. And perhaps we can find a little comfort in the fact that new species are actually still coming into existence in this dessicated world — even if said new species seem highly likely to lead to our own ultimate demise (Not talking about you, Killer Sponge!).
We especially like the Small Favor (a mushroom shaped like a phallus), the Bug-Eating Slug (because who doesn’t want a slug that eats bugs, plus the babies are cute!), and the Udderly Weird Yam, which resembles a delicious platter of chicken fingers from the neighborhood pub but is, in fact, far healthier … if you were to eat it, which you shouldn’t, because it’s endangered.
Honorable mention to the Far-Out Frogfish, which looks like what we wished we hallucinated, and Twi-hard fan fave the Dracula Minnow, a fish with a surprisingly Cullen-esque overbite — which really should have been named after Edward instead of some freak with a widow’s peak written about by Bram Whatever-His-Name-Is like a million years ago if these scientists knew anything about publicity. Which they don’t, because they’ve been too busy identifying the Top 10 New Species of 2010.
There, doesn’t everyone feel better?