Remember Michael Mineo? He’s the Brooklyn tattoo artist who accused a few of New York’s Finest of sodomizing him with their nightstick in the subway. The cops were acquitted in the criminal case, but Mineo’s civil suit is ongoing. And now, via the New York Post, a lawyer for the city has responded to Mineo’s allegation that the city tampered with the underwear he was wearing the night in question….
By arguing about time stamps, the shape of the hole, and now, calling them an “optical illusion”:
“The timeline of the photographs clearly exposes the plaintiff’s theory as a farce,” wrote city lawyer Johana Castro in court papers. “The so-called ‘flap’ is an optical illusion created by bunching of the fabric.”
Granted, changing timestamps on photographs and cutting holes in underwear are perfectly in line with the kind of cheap tricks NYPD cops could get away with if they were going to tamper with evidence. But between New York’s Boys in Blue and Mineo — who was originally busted for smoking weed in the subway — it’s highly doubtful any of the parties involved are capable of producing anything even remotely close to an “optical illusion” of any kind, specifically pertaining to sodomized underwear. That’s some Imagineer-level business, right there. And if they did: Impressive. Truly.