Food

17 Inadvertently Meaningful Chinese Menu Misspellings: An Annotated List

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Whether these represent typos, misspellings, bad transliterations, or — as some have suggested — Chinese menu writers working with a badly flawed 19th-century English dictionary, all of these come from restaurants located in the five boroughs. Whatever the cause, they form a highly entertaining and cross-cultural type of meta-literature.

Sliced Couch with XO Sauce……………$21.95
But then where will they sit?

Sting Beans with Thick Noodce………..$8.99
If a bean bites, use the noodle poultice.

Crispy Colorectal…………………………….$14.99
The proctologist’s fave.

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Sea Claim in Black Bean Sauce………..$12.95
A matter for maritime lawyers.

Alumni Perch………………………………….$16.95
Don’t want to eat no stadium seats.

Stewed Bullwhack with Ginseng
and Chinese Lycium
…………………………$6.95
Aftermath of a bullfight?

Duck w. Taco Peel Noodle Soup……….$5.50
Taco peel = skin treatment.

Steamed Buttlo Fish w.
Preserved Vegetable
………………………..$11.95
End-dangered species?

Sauteed Bok Choy & Fungus
In Thickening Sauce
……………………….$7.99
Coagulates as you watch.

Mutton w. Cumm in Seasoner
In Hot & Chili
………………………………..$10.99
Not touching that one.

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Do Do Frog’s Leg………………………….$14.95
Use toilet paper, O Amphibian!

Slippery Fish Filet………………………..$12.00
Oops! Just dropped it on the floor.

Chinese Wolfberry Strew
w Snow Clam
………………………………..$5.00
A strew? Well, la-di-dah.

Boss Fish Stew with Tofu…………….$10.00
It orders you.

Fresh Fish with Burnt Sauce……….$17.99
Begging to be sent back.

Sauteed Snail Piece………………………$15.99
The shell? An antenna?

Meat Ball w. Blotch Soup………………$8.99
Request Clearasil sauce.

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