We all have our opinions on whether or not a group of abdominal-flaunting werewolves should be getting their thang on to Grizzly Bear via Twilight, but it’s time we hear it straight from the fans themselves. Thus, I ventured to Union Square’s Regal Cinema last night; there, hundreds of seasoned “twi-hards” gathered to experience the Twilight saga’s third film, Eclipse, premiering at midnight. Polling various members of the the twi-mob, I ascertained the true impact of the film’s infamous soundtracks. And, holy shit.
What is your critical assessment of the Eclipse soundtrack?
Lea, Who Looks Like Kristen Stewart’s Stunt Double: I don’t even know who half these people are.
How about your assessment, do you think Death Cab for Cutie would side with Team Jacob or Team Edward?
Steven: Better be Team Jacob, because he’s South American–I’m Hispanic!
Which is your favorite song off the album?
Dana, A Woman Holding the Doll Above: Mine is [Metric’s] “All Yours,” because it could go from either Jacob’s point of view or Edward’s point of view. You know, “Keep your hand off unless you want to…tango.”
Is that doll you’re holding the werewolf dude?
Dana: Yes, yes it is.
Out of the three soundtracks, which one do you keep on repeat?
Twilight Mom 1: I love the one we made ourselves. [Shows iPod containing Duran Duran’s “Hungry Like the Wolf” and The Killers’ “Tranquilize”]
[Turning to another one of the Twilight Moms] Which was the song you picked on this fan-made soundtrack?
Twilight Mom 2: I chose “Congratulations” by Blue October, but mine didn’t make it because I sent it too late.
As in, congratulating Edward [Robert Pattinson] for impregnating Bella [Kristen Stewart] in the book?
Twilight Mom 2: No, more like cheering them from the sidelines.
Aside from your own soundtrack, what did you like on the official ones?
Twilight Mom 3: My favorite one is when they’re underwater…I just love its placement in the movie.
Do you remember the name? Here’s a list I have of all the songs…
Twilight Mom 3: [Points to Grizzly Bear’s “Slow Life”]
Who do you think is missing from the latest soundtrack?
Girl Wearing Official Twilight T-Shirt: I really liked Paramore’s “Decode” on the first soundtrack. I thought they captured the theme very well.
What was the theme?
[Everyone around her bursts into laughter, briefly stumped]
Jeanne, Another Girl Wearing an Official Twilight T-Shirt: Because you had to “Decode” Bella and Edward…[looks across to her friend] Why are you laughing at me??
Laughing Friend: No, you’re making good points! I’m impressed.
Jeanne: You had to “Decode” Edward and his family and his…urges.
Laughing Friend [Looking over at me]: I hope we’re helping you with this stuff; I hope it’s not a bunch of blib-blop blip-blop.
No, this is all very helpful.