Disgustingly Rich Hamptons Renter Is So Getting Some This Summer


Gosh, having an article written about how wealthy and available you are in the New York Post is a surefire way to attract dudes! How did we not know this until now? Cheryl Mercuris, whose diabolical plan to rent an obnoxiously priced ($500,000-for-two-weeks) Bridgehampton glamour-manse in order to find her a goddamn man was revealed yesterday by the paper, “is being chased by enough suitors to fill the mega home’s 14 bedrooms three times over.” Which sounds appealing, if not hygienic.

Along with numerous phone calls and emails,

The self-made 40-something Florida entrepreneur says she has also received hundreds of friend requests on Facebook and been besieged by a torrent of text messages from well-heeled East Enders offering to set her up.

She has even attracted attention from the rarest of rare finds in New York: a 29-year-old investment banker/former college basketball player who is tall! A lesson to us all, ladies: Stop playing coy. Tell the world what you want, and it shall be yours.

Cost-benefit ratio of $500,000 for two weeks vs. a night with a 6’7″ former basketball player?

“It was worth every penny,” the deep-pocketed divorcée told the Post.

Hey, fellas, did I mention the rent-stabilized, occasionally air-conditioned one-room hovel that I’ll be staying in all summer long?

(Note to Cheryl: Make ’em call you. Text messages do not bode well.)