Please Welcome the Best Website Ever, “Questlove’s Celebrity Stories,” Starring a Hilarious Canibus Dis and the Time He Met Will Smith


Well, this was entirely unexpected. Behold: a massive compendium of every celebrity ubiquitous Roots drummer and all around hero Questlove has ever met, complete with the story of how it happened and what they were like. Highlights include his summary dismissal of the ’90s mixtape rap star Canibus–“all of my interactions with him are always the same: jam session. he spits. turns around to stop me from drumming so the audience can hear him. and there is never a “ooooooooooooooooooh!!” moment.”–and the time he went over to Will Smith’s house, which is a story it takes him about ten thousand words to tell:

my boy says you can judge the level of success someone has in hollywood by the amount of seconds it takes you to get from the gate of the entry to the actual house.

while doing 20mph it took 35 seconds.

imma just do the point system.

drove through the jurassic park gates
passed 3 city blocks. with 15 brownstone per block.
–yes a REAL neighborhood.
was told they fly family out there for reunions and stuff. makes it easier.
so even to live in his BROWNSTONE is a life achievement…let alone HIS crib
he has a stadium in which he does sunday Bball games with his boys/crew
(yes a real stadium with referees and a scoreboard bleachers, lockerooms and concession stands)
you step in the house and you notice the floor is MADE OF BUTTER LEATHER
the whole time im asking him “are we allowed to…step on this?”
his housekeeper gives you orange juice only to realize its 3 days old. and it MUST BE FRESH SQUEEZED.

you joke (what you got a grove and workers in the backyard?) only for jada to open the door to reveal a grove and workers in the back yard.

the spice rack and its fungshui’d color coordination is so impressive and big you yourself say this is a life goal for you wanna reach….

not have this spice rack.

just live here.

in this room


It goes on for about three times as long as that, but you get the idea. Also featured? Tina Fey, Robert De Niro, Ol Dirty Bastard, and about a hundred other people. Perfect Friday reading. [Questlove’s Celebrity Stories]