Stupid Trends: Cosmetic Foot Surgery


For those seeking proof that people are stupid, there is this: Cosmetic foot surgery, a/k/a, the “Cinderella procedure,” the absolute latest in ridiculous plastic surgery trends. If you have ugly, questionable, too fat, too skinny, wrinkly, or otherwise compromised feet, you can fix them permanently and live your life as a full and enabled human being! Kudos to the Daily News on finding the photo for their article, which, no kidding, almost made us vomit. And that’s saying a lot.

The News calls this a “worrying trend,” but the only worrying thing is that these people aren’t also getting free lobotomies thrown in with their “foot-tuck fat pad augmentations,” and “toe-shortening operations.” Or maybe they already had those.

Ali Sadrieh, founder of the Beverly Hills Aesthetic Foot Surgery in Studio City, California (this is why we can never move to L.A.), says “It’s unrealistic to tell women not to wear high heels.” Instead, she provides toe trimmings and lengthenings to her clients. That makes sense.

People: Feet aren’t pretty in the first place. Get a pedicure now and again, apply some lotion regularly, or just keep those nasties in your shoes. And get a hobby! Or, whatever, spend all your savings on making “the toes twinkle in sandals.” Surely it will all be worth it when you snag the foot fetishist of your dreams.

Tip: For a bargain, call those subway bunion ad people. We bet they’re good at this sort of thing.