We usually leave the music criticism to our friends at Sound of the City, but in this case, the so-called music is so devastating as to be actually rather newsy, and certainly devastating enough to merit a word from us. Michael Lohan, Lindsay’s occasionally trying-to-be-a-father-person, has written her a Daddy ballad (allegedly this went down during one of his own stints in the clink), and then hired one of his cronies to sing it before producing the shit out of it and selling it to TMZ.
Aw, Daddy; way to make up for (allegedly) spreading that AIDs rumor about your daughter! This is like the opposite of a Mel Gibson phone call, and equally frightening.
The good news is: We hear Lindsay’s doing okay in jail, where she’s busy eating Twizzlers and making art. Um, we’re actually kind of jealous.