Frankie and the Outs Want You To Buy Them a Van


Hey, look, it’s another Kickstarter campaign! Local bikini-bashers Frankie and the Outs would like your aid in acquiring a tour van for their fall tour. Not just any van, but more specifically, one of the following: a “sweet” van, a “mini-van,” or an “Astrovan.” To illustrate how badly they need this van, there’s an accompanying non-embeddable video segment of the four bandmates standing beside a random vehicle parked outside their practice space, treating the rattletrap chassis as if it’s a Showcase Showdown reveal and they’re Barker’s Beauties. They say “Ta-daaaah!” and everything.

Even more beguiling are the commitments they promise to extra-generous benefactors. Pledge $300 and you’ll be rewarded not only with live EPs, limited-edition cassette releases, a T-shirt, etc., you’ll also be given a haircut from Frankie Rose (last we read she was a bartender? perhaps she also has a cosmetology license), a “makeover and personal shopping session at Beacon’s Closet with Caroline Yes, a game of Scrabble or Foursquare with the band (or our drummer will beat you at chess), or a personal tarot reading!” Donate $500 and you get all that, plus dinner–they will even do dishes–and a one-on-one yoga session with Ms. Yes. And if you can somehow forgo a month’s rent on their behalf and contribute $1000, they will “play a private acoustic set at your house!!!” Exclamation points theirs.

So much enthusiasm!!! Strange, then, that when we asked to talk with them about the campaign, Frankie declined via her publicist. Hmm. No matter, as of this posting, 46 backers have promised $2,480 of the $4,000 (62%) with two days remaining. (Update: as of 11:40 am on July 30, they’ve got $3,130 funded with 56 hours to go. Woo hoo!) Godspeed, friends, and if anyone out there gets Frankie and the Outs to play your attic, please do send us pics.

Download: Frankie and the Outs, “Little Brown Haired Girls” (MP3)