Neighborhoods

Crazy Scary Mystery Bat Disease/Drug Conspiracy Scaring Bats, Creatures of the Night Everywhere

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Do you know any bats? Any Batmen, Batgirls, or Bat-Children? Tell them to be scared, aware, and on the lookout! As bats everywhere are being persecuted by…

…white noses? Via Yahoo, Reuters explains:

Deadly white-nose syndrome is threatening to make one insect-eating species of bat extinct, at least regionally, U.S. researchers reported on Thursday. The infection is spreading quickly across the Northeastern United States and Canada and is likely to cause the regional extinction of the little brown myotis bat, the researchers report in the journal Science.

Yes, deadly “white-nose” syndrome. We have that problem downtown, too. This is of course not to be confused with “White Noise” syndrome, which is what happens when undergraduates read too much Don DeLillo and become assholes. Where did the problem start?

It was only identified four years ago, in bats nesting in caves near Albany, New York.

Never doubt the ability of a New York state politician to dismantle any potential threats of justice in his or her vicinity. Gotham City needs a hero now more than ever. And we’re all out of bats. BATS!

[fkamer@villagevoice.com]