New Yorkers: We’re All Living Longer, But Dudes, You’re Still Dying First


There’s a new report out about men’s health in New York City. The good news: We’re all living longer than ever. If you were born in 2007 (and can read; if not, ask Mommy or Daddy to read this to you), you will probably live to an average of 79.4 years. But: Men die six years before women on average (at 76 as opposed to 82), meaning the cougar psychology may be more than just a pairing of sexual compatibilities.

More than a third of deaths among New York City men occur before age 65 — mostly because of heart disease and violence (though not, generally, at the same time). Also, men aged 18 to 34 die at more than twice the rate of women in New York City. No wonder this town is full of single women.

Guys, you probably know what you can do to be healthier, and if you don’t, you’re not going to pick it up here. Still, we’ll go ahead and reiterate that smoking is generally bad, while things like exercising and eating right are said to be good. Try it! Maybe you’ll like it.

Among 35- to 64-year-old men, the highest rates of preventable hospitalization for heart disease were in Williamsburg and Bushwick, as well as sections of the Bronx. The highest homicide rates for men aged 18 to 34 were in Hunts Point and Mott Haven in the Bronx and in Bedford-Stuyvesant, Crown Heights, and East New York, in Brooklyn.

Ladies who want lifelong husbands, we suggest seeking elsewhere for a mate. Ladies who want to become wealthy widows, we’ll leave you to your own devices.

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