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Page Six Magazine profiled model Brooklyn Decker — who lives in DUMBO, Brooklyn — for this season’s issue of the failed-but-somehow-still-living magazine. You can imagine how this goes:
But Brooklyn would rather avoid the attention and nerd out on interior design in her new home in Dumbo, Brooklyn. She and Andy bought a condo there in January, and she has quickly fallen in love with the fashionably quirky cobbled neighborhood and its environs. “Barneys Co-Op is coming, and I’m so excited,” Brooklyn says of the new outpost of the designer department store scheduled to open in October in Cobble Hill. “It’s symbolic of how much Brooklyn has changed, even from like five years ago. I love how people here are so creative and artsy.” Before moving to the borough, Brooklyn lived in Manhattan for four years, jetting from modeling gigs to movie auditions to tennis tournaments.
Someone’s getting a little Google-Results happy, no? Somewhere, Marty Markowitz is either having a heart attack or a mild aneurysm. Also, if you didn’t know it before, never forget: There is nothing in Zoolander that doesn’t ring true on some level.
Not counting the captions, the piece uses the word “Brooklyn” 43 times, in efforts to assert both the cool-factor of this mysterious place outside of Manhattan and the shiny person they put on their cover who lives there, who has the same name. In fact, at one point in this week’s issue, Page Six Magazine apparently notes Brooklyn as “the city’s coolest nabe,” which if true, as Jeff Bercovici notes, would be the fourth-largest city in America on its own. Wait until Page Six discovers this whole “Williamsburg” place. Their minds might melt.