If you haven’t already noticed, if you live in Williamsburg — or anywhere off the L-Train, really — you’re about to have the worst weekend commute maybe ever. So what are your options?
Well, let’s start with the problem: from 11:30 PM tonight until 5 AM Monday morning, there is no L-Train service between Brooklyn and Manhattan. None. Zero. Nothing. L-Train service is running between Rockaway Parkway and Myrtle-Wyckoff Avenues, but that won’t get you to Manhattan.
So how do you get between Williamsburg/Bushwick/the rest of the L-Train line to Myrtle-Wyckoff and Manhattan this weekend? The MTA has made it typically easy to figure out:
Click to enlarge:
Enjoy the hell of out that. Your other options:
1. Get a cab.
2. Find some people at the Delancey-Essex Street station to share a cab with across the bridge.
3. Get a bike.
4. Don’t leave Williamsburg this weekend.
5. Get some nice walking shoes.
6. Book a hotel room in Manhattan this weekend.
7. Use your bat-wings to fly across the East River.
8. Magic Carpet Ride, which no doubt, more than a few Trust-Funded Williamsburg Hipsters have already invested in. And by “Magic Carpet Ride,” we mean “Take enough acid until you wake up with a working L-Train on Monday, hopefully alive, clothed, and not in prison.”
9. Commute on horseback. It’s a Sunday Styles piece in the making.
10. Buy a Jetpack. A real one.
Mind you, this comes the same week as the MTA fares “skyrocket” to $104 for an unlimited monthly Metrocard. This is what you’re paying for with all that money: an opportunity to share a cab with other pissed off commuters with Williamsburg.
Fuck the MTA. Fuck them, fuck them, fuck them. Fuck them with a Third Rail.