Food

Today in Juvenilia: Peels and Anal Warts; Mama Rosa’s Batshit Crazy Staff

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Every time we’ve looked up the address for Peels on Google, we end up with numerous links to skin-care clinics and dermatologists. So we feel the pain, the absolute pain, of this BlackBook writer whose search for the restaurant yielded not only similar results, but also a listing and (convenient!) map location for “NYC Anal Warts.”

The writer posits that perhaps Taavo Somer didn’t consider this issue when naming his impeccably winsome restaurant, but we beg to differ: We suspect he knew exactly what he was doing. This is a man, after all, who built his reputation on having one of the most difficult-to-locate restaurants in the city. If he can’t hide Peels’ rather prominent location on the Bowery, Somer can still present his clientele with some rather befuddling obstacles to their dinner with his choice of name. And, really, there are few obstacles to dinner more befuddling than anal warts.

Also befuddling are the completely freaked-out, batshit ramblings of two employees of Mama Rosa, a recently opened Park Slope restaurant, that appeared in the comments section of Fucked in Park Slope.

The comments followed the FIPS blogger’s review of the restaurant, where she encountered surreally awful service. Even by the standards of Internet commentary, particularly Internet food-related commentary, the comments are insane — check out the employee’s offer to “rearrange your face” and accusations that the blogger hasn’t gotten “a stiff dick” for “over a century.”

Charming! If they’re any indication of the restaurant’s brand of hospitality, we’d rather dig through a hundred illustrated anal-warts-removal advertisements to find Peels’ address than order the guacamole at Mama Rosa’s.

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