Catalyzed by booze and an incessant need to couple up for the winter season (because, let’s be honest, NYC relationships function seasonally), Missed Connections has been on fire recently. In addition to the flyers from our lovelorn friend JJ, the Metropolitan-Lorimer bachelor looking for his Kristy (or was it Kristie? Krissy?), Craigslist was full of notable listings in honor of Halloween. For example:
“This Chilean miner walked and talked with the Double Rainbow down Essex and over to Allen, wondering, what did it mean?… Loved the costumes, and would be interested in further discussions on phenomena in the earth’s atmosphere with you.”
“I was a zombie and tried to take a bite out of you on the platform… Hope this finds you so we can plan our next halloween costumes together!”
“I was dressed as Marty McFly, you were impressed by my costume… If you want I can show up with the calculator watch and the walkman.”
“…Just when you couldn’t get more attractive, you smiled and I turned into a giddy, drunk girl… You were a scrabble piece for Halloween, let me know what letter you were.”
“I didn’t get the sense you wanted me to ask for your number; but just in case I was wrong…”
“I was the cowboy that came over and chatted you up. I thought you had a very pretty face under that big mess of hair…”
But if her impersonation wasn’t as good as this guy’s: Run dude. Just… run.
I hope we’ve helped these couples find their way, I would hate to see another missed opportunity for a Bob Ross/Cowboy lovechild. And we all know this world could use another God-fearing Crip.