Bedbugs Demand Education, Even If It Is Just the Public Kind


Bedbugs. We have them. Well, not us, in particular (not yet, fingers crossed), but New York City clearly has them. And New York City schools have them, now more than ever. The Daily News reports a spike in cases in public schools, up to 336 in the first two months of the school year, from 135 in the same period last year.

Expressing the sentiments of, like, everyone:

“I was, like, ‘OMG, there’s bedbugs in the school,'” said one fifth grader.

Last year there were a reported 1,019 cases in schools overall, a number that will easily be surpassed if the cases continue at the current rate. But the Education Department insists that since they don’t have beds, it can’t be an epidemic. Um, did you guys hear about Hollister? Or Victoria’s Secret? Or movie theaters?

Officials wouldn’t give a full list of the schools so bedbug-bothered, but confirmed at least one case in 16 of them this year, including those in Manhattan, Queens, the Bronx, and Brooklyn.

Which brings up a question: What’s worse for a child’s development — homeschooling or bedbugs?

Manhattan Borough President Scott Stringer would say bedbugs…

“I’m calling for a full on war against bedbugs starting in the public school system,” he told the Daily News. “We should deal with bedbugs the way we deal with crime spikes, and we need to do it before it gets out of control.”

No word on how bedbugs will respond to jail time.