Make Oprah laugh, and the world laughs with you. Or you get a hundred bucks, whichever’s cheaper. Julio Bazan, a 49-year-old panhandler, was hanging out minding his own business in the Meatpacking on Sunday when he noticed the queen of daytime television, the mistress of the universe, Oprah mother-fucking Winfrey, just chilling in her limo in front of the Soho House, reports the New York Post.
He asked her for some cash, and she said she had none and — why do we all do this? — “showed him her empty purse.”
Then he pulled out the big guns. A funny. Reportedly:
“Hey, Oprah, why is it good to date a homeless man? [Because] when you’re finished, you can drop him off anywhere.”
She laughed, suddenly realized her purse wasn’t so empty, suddenly realized HE MIGHT BE RIGHT, and passed him five $20s through the window. And the world turned.
Wisely, Bazan used his windfall on “booze, underwear, and a steak dinner.”