Tiger Woods Crashed His Car, Derailed His Life One Year Ago Today


This time last year, Tiger Woods was on his way down. On November 27, 2009, the once-golden golf star was injured in a car accident outside of his home in Orlando, Florida. According to preliminary local reports and the initial statement Woods posted to his website, “the car crash that sent him to a hospital is his fault and has become embarrassing to him and his family, but he plans to keep it a private matter.” If only! In the days, weeks and months that followed, Woods’ world crumbled. So how’s he commemorating the one-year mark?

And there you have it: a subtle acknowledgment of the anniversary without getting into the dirty parts.

If you spent the last twelve months trapped in a Chilean mine, Woods’ car crash story started to unravel when TMZ reported that it was all a cover-up for domestic violence because just days earlier, the National Enquirer alleged Woods was having an affair with New York City club promoter Rachel Uchitel. From there it came out that Woods had slept with every porn star and IHOP waitress (seriously) in the nation. It all culminated in the release of a bunch of hilarious sexts from Tiger to the porn star Joslyn James. Remember?

Tiger:Sent: 03:43 PM 08/29/2009:
Ok. I would like to have a threesome with you and another girl you trust

Tiger:Sent: 03:48 PM 08/29/2009:
Does that excite you at all or no

(The Woods saga also gave birth to the hilarious Taiwanese animations — the original, from Nov. 28, 2009 — which are now done with English translation and too much self-awareness. But at one point, they were revolutionary.)

He was also on the cover of the New York Post for 20 straight days, or one more than September 11th.

Today, Woods is still working to reinvent his image. According to the Associated Press, America is ready to talk to Tiger again:

A survey within the last month to test Woods’ appeal produced “very powerful, positive, positive results,” his longtime agent, Mark Steinberg, said, adding that he’s already engaged in “several constructive conversations.”

“We are a society of second chances. That’s been proven over the years,” Steinberg said. “He’s not going to be in any deal until he looks the company in the eye and has a serious conversation with them. ‘How are you going to live your life? We want to be part of the redemption, rehabilitation. Are you serious about that?’ And he knows that. He’s comfortable with it. And he’s going to do that.”

Sponsors are beginning to trickle back, but everyone agrees that to be the marketing force he once was, Woods needs to start winning again on the golf course. And if that doesn’t work out, we never did see a sex tape.