Today, Anne Hathaway and James Franco were named the hosts of this year’s Academy Awards. The Daily News reports that Bruce Cohen and Don Mischer (the producers of the Oscars) said, “James Franco and Anne Hathaway personify the next generation of Hollywood icons — fresh, exciting, and multi-talented.” They also personify a combined age of 60. Here are 5 pairs that we’d choose over FrancAway.
John Stewart and Steven Colbert
Why the pair makes sense: Their Rally to Restore Sanity And/Or Fear was an unprecedented success. Maybe the political duo could take their much needed viral buzz to the Oscar telecast and inject some life into it. Stewart hosted a good ceremony in 2007 and Colbert is never afraid to roast people sitting in the audience — no matter who the person is.
Why they’re better than FrancAway: Not only are they a lot funnier, Stewart and Colbert have amazing chemistry. Betty White and Justin Timberlake
Why the pair makes sense: Justin’s comedic chops would work nicely with Betty’s dry wit. Hosting with Justin would also give Betty a lot of crowd-pleasing “I’m old but still horny jokes.”
Why they’re better than FrancAway: Justin represents “young Hollywood” while Betty White carries a timeless appeal. Plus: Different hair colors! Natalie Portman and Zach Braff
Why the pair makes sense: The pair that starred together in Garden State needs a reunion. That was everyone’s favorite movie in 2004, and if it wasn’t yours — you’re lying [Ed note: This speaks to the sentiment of the author of this post and not the Village Voice in its entirety]. Watch the scene above; if you don’t cry a little, you have no soul.
Why they’re better than FrancAway: Although they’re on the same level of “whiteness”/”brunetteness” as FrancAway, Portman and Braff are really gosh-darn cute together! Not to mention, dude could use a career pick-me-up.
Jay-Z and Beyonce
Why the pair makes sense: Everything Jay-Z touches turns to gold and Beyonce is a golden goddess! They could open the show with “Crazy in Love” rewritten to include all of the nominated films. It’ll have Billy Crystal pooping in his pants.
Why they’re better than FrancAway: If this isn’t the picture of perfection, we’re not really sure what is.
Woody and Buzz
Why the pair makes sense: Woody and Buzz Lightyear have been the best of friends since 1995. That’s a 15-year unbreakable friendship! And they’d bring back a grand tradition of animated hosts: See Donald Duck at the 30th Academy Awards in 1958.
Why they’re better than FrancAway: FrancAway may both be nominated this year for Oscars (Franco for 127 Hours and Hathaway for Love and Other Drugs). Neither of them will win. But Toy Story 3 faces no opposition in the animated film category — Pixar movies always win.