News & Politics

Handy Fat Rolls Conceal Stolen Goodies for Enterprising Oklahoma Ladies

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Here’s one deserving the WTF tag, if there ever was. Two women have been arrested for shoplifting at a TJ Maxx in Oklahoma. This wasn’t any boring old garden variety put-that-lipstick-in-your-purse shoplifting! Oh, no. They managed to shove four pairs of boots, three pairs of jeans, a wallet, and gloves “under their belly fat and breasts.” IMPRESSIVE.

Officer James Hamm, who had to work to maintain a straight face when speaking to the press, said, “These two were actually concealing [the items] in areas of their body where excess skin was, under their chest area and armpits.”

The two, Ailene Brown, 28, and Shmeco Thomas, 37, have been arrested. Brown also had a knife for cutting security tags…but she kept that in her purse.

This is what makes local news sing: “Anything they can open they will put things into.”

[via Pat’s Papers/Alva Review/Courier]

Previously:
“Man Forced to Eat Own Beard. Also, Beards Are Edible.”
“Turkey in Pants Heist Does Not Pan Out for Local Teen”

This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on December 1, 2010

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