“I am not a witch” – Senatorial candidate Christine O’Donnell, who is also not employed.
“It may be a blessing in disguise” – Evangelist Pat Robertson on the Haiti earthquake that killed possibly more than 100,000 people.
“Obviously we gotta stand with our North Korean allies.” – Sarah Palin, who probably misses East Berlin.
“Frustrated Obama Sends Nation Rambling 75,000-Word Email” – a headline on Fox News’s website, which later updated it to note that the story was from The Onion (a satirical paper). Then they just took it down.
“Ground Zero Mosque supporters: doesn’t it stab you in the heart, as it does ours throughout the heartland? Peaceful Muslims, pls refudiate”–Sarah Palin via Twitter. She later reworked those thoughts to make them more grammatical, but not any more incisive, alas.
So thank you, Sarah, for giving us two of the top five! You’re a winner! Pls don’t refudiate!