Why wait all the way till the end of the year for all those inevitable-2011-in-review stories?
As always, I’m wildly ahead of the curve and on top of the trend.
So how has the year been so far?
Well, as pop culture’s most avid observer, I’m totally your man for the wrapup:
Jake Gyllenhaal and Taylor Swift shockingly broke up after a torrid three or four day romance.
GM announced that their sales went up 6.3% last year.
The snow eventually was plowed, shoveled, or melted away, only to have some more drop down.
A psycho shot people in Arizona, stupidly taking Sarah Palin literally.
A Portuguese model killed and castrated his “daddy,” proving the queers demand equal psycho rights.
And Vinnie from Jersey Shore launched a clothing line.
That’s about it!
Overall, it was a heartbreaking year of struggle and revolt, yet we soldiered through it with our usual moxie and style.
Cheers, everyone. On to 2012!