ZOMG! We were stressed about the latest life-changing astrological information, which actually is not “news” at all, but something people have known about for years! Still, we were stressed! Fortunately, CNN puts an end to our worries that our astrological sign might have changed with the very important news that it (probably) did not: “If [people] adhered to the tropical zodiac — which, if they’re a Westerner, they probably did — absolutely nothing has changed for them.” As they go on to explain,
That’s because the tropical zodiac – which is fixed to seasons, and which Western astrology adheres to – differs from the sidereal zodiac – which is fixed to constellations and is followed more in the East, and is the type of zodiac to which the Star Tribune article ultimately refers.
Well. Color us Pisces. Now, without stopping to freak out because WTF, there is more than one zodiac!?!, let’s return to our regularly scheduled programming.