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Mummified Slices of Roberta’s Margherita Pizza Still Edible After One Month

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The way it came about was this: After a foray to the sainted Bushwick pizzeria, I found myself with two slices of the pie remaining. But when I got home, I forgot about them and recycled the carton with the newspapers. When the quantity of paper and packaging became so great I could no longer move around my kitchen, I decided to recycle.

And there among the Timeses, Rolling Stones, egg cartons, and catalogs I found the ancient pizza box. Inside were two slices as brittle as Ritz crackers. Without hesitating, I picked one up and started to eat it.

It tasted remarkably like the day it had been baked, except the fresh mozzarella was a little cheddary, and the tomato sauce stuck to my lips like glue. Not a bad way to store your leftover pizza, though — doesn’t take up any valuable space in the fridge.

Fake chef Guy Fieri has become a painful presence in NYC lately. In subway cars and other public conveyances, posters of him have appeared flogging his game show (with a scratch-off tie-in) called Minute to Win It. I swear I didn’t draw that penis on his face.

Child prodigy plays Chopin in front of fruit-stand mural in Times Square.

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