Apply to Be Charlie Sheen’s Intern in 75 Characters or Less


Just as we urged our readers to un-follow Charlie Sheen on Twitter, we came across this gold mine. has posted a listing for an 8 week, full-time, paid internship with none other than TeamSheen. “Do you have #TigerBlood? Are you all about #Winning?” the listing asks, going on to say, “We want you on #TeamSheen as our social media #TigerBloodIntern!”

It continues,

“The internship will focus on executing a social media strategy that will build on the success Charlie Sheen has attained in setting the Guinness World Record for the fastest time to reach one million followers on Twitter.”

Here’s the catch: You only have 75 characters to explain why you should be the Social Media Intern. Naturally, we decided to take a crack at it.

I should be the Social Media Intern because…

Myles Tanzer/@MylesTanzer: “I’m a bitchin’ social media rockstar from Mars.”

Averie Timm/@avenyc: “I’m a woman. Meaning I already fit Sheen’s description of slave labor.”

Jen Doll/@thisisjendoll: “It would help immeasurably with my campaign to get America to unfollow him.”

Joe Coscarelli/@joecoscarelli: (Joe answered with an image):

Nick Greene/@NickGreene: “I figure you’re going to die soon, and this position seems will-adjacent.”

Applicants selected for the next round will be notified on March 14. Here’s hoping none of us get the job.