Supreme Court Justices Are Nerds; Mel Gibson Somehow Involved


When most Americans punch out at 5 o’clock, we plop down in our armchairs, crack open a cold brew, and watch CBS until we forget our Social Security numbers. Work is for the office, home is for NCIS: Los Angeles. Members of the Supreme Court didn’t get the memo. The Wall Street Journal ran a piece today about Supreme Court Justices’ favorite hobby: presiding over the mock trials of fictional characters. The most recent trial, concerning Hamlet’s insanity defense for the murder of Polonius, was even attended by Mel Gibson. The play’s the thing, Sugar Tits!

Justice Anthony Kennedy held the trial for Hamlet in Los Angeles and he was eventually declared sane by the jury. Blair Berk, the lawyer who negotiated Mel Gibson’s no-contest plea to misdemeanor battery for hitting his ex-girlfriend, represented Hamlet. Mel was in the court’s gallery (for once), and watched his defense attorney defend yet another entitled madman. She went to the actor for advice.

Advice about crazy people? No! Advice about Hamlet! “He knows it on a level you couldn’t imagine,” she told the Journal.

If they ever do a mock trial concerning who killed Jesus, Mr. Gibson may have some opinions on that matter as well.

Shakespeare is a popular subject for these litigations, with King Lear, Twelfth Night and Henry V all being the basis for mock trials headed by Supreme Court Justices. Sorry for, er, judging you guys, but these seem pretty dry. We’ve come up with a list of some fictional cases that would really get people buzzing:

  • Joe v. the Volcano
  • Who Smelt It v. Who Dealt It
  • Biff v. Marty McFly
  • Future Biff v. Marty McFly
  • Deep Impact v. Armageddon
  • Dick van Dyke v. Ottoman

Supreme Night Court: Judges Relax By Trying the Fictitious and the Dead [WSJ]