Art

What Do You Do When You’re at a Dinner Party…?

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And they serve something so bizarre you’d wear it as a hat before you’d ever consider consuming it?

I was just at a “Pop Art/Pop Up” dinner at the new Sanctuary Hotel, which is jazzily done up with all sorts of modern art references.

(“That’s art?” said a young person at the table, amazed. He was referring to Keith Haring smiley faces!)

Anyway, the first course was a “Jeff Koons Balloon Dog (Orange) 1994-2000,” which consisted of carrot, Stilton, coconut, cardamom, and lemongrass.

It was basically carrot ices, and none too tasty, even for a balloon dog.

I tried to crush it into cold carrot soup, but that wasn’t too delightful, either, so it just sat there, as waiters tried to pawn off extra ones on me!

Should I have done an I Love Lucy and looked for a potted plant?

Nah, I think I did the right thing by sitting it out and waiting for the next course (a “Damien Hirst” scallop and potato thing), which was considerably better.

The chef, 15-year-old Greg Grossman — is to be commended for his dash and daring.

Similarly, the next night at Lair (201 Lafayette Street), the roasted bone marrow was too Flintstones for my taste, but the beef dumplings, mango and shrimp salad, and walnut-covered marshmallows were amazing.

God, I’m superficial.