President Donald Trump In 2012


Don’t laugh. It could happen. After all California raisin, I mean California Reagan made it to the White House once, as I recall.

And Trump tied for second place in a recent Wall Street Journal poll of Republican potentials, as Ms. Palin’s jaw dropped to the lower tundra.

That alone is pretty horrifying, considering the ultra conservatism of Trump’s birther campaign, not to mention his virulent anti gay marriage stance and generally bloviator-ness and bad hair.

So what do we do if the worst case scenario turns true and he’s not fired?

The obvious response is to blithely say “Let’s all move to Canada,” but moving is a pain in the ass and would it be any more aesthetically pleasing to live in the place that brought us Justin Bieber?

No, I have a far better solution:

Let’s just stay home for four years and not read a single thing or even turn on the TV!

Go into heavier denial mode than Jennifer Aniston does about boyfriends.

Keep your head in the freezer and make sure it’s well stocked with all kinds of rainbow sherbet and layer cakes.

Don’t plug into anything going on, if you can help it, and pray it’ll all end up a dream, like that whole season of Dallas (or like my last relationship).

And the same goes if Romney or Huckabee win!

This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on April 12, 2011

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