In the ongoing battle of resident vs. tourist, East Village old-timer vs. newbie, person who was here way back when and person who’s puking in the gutters now, comes this tale, by way of our blogger pal EV Grieve, in which an East Villager was rudely awoken at 4 a.m. Monday by shouting and music emanating from a parked “safari party bus” on East 5th Street. Hoping to avoid waking his kids, he went outside to confront the issue at hand and ended up going a little bit…crazy.
From EV Grieve:
When I went outside I wasn’t thinking that I’d be trying to kick their door in. Maybe I tried to push the door open to scream at them to move on? I don’t quite remember…except that the door was shut hard and that I was giving it my all now, repeatedly…wham! wham! wham!
As I was doing this I think I was screaming to get the bus OFF this street (maybe not as nicely as that). At one point I exchanged some words with someone baiting me at one of the two open windows, he telling me how he was going to fuck me up and holding a kitchen scissors as if it was a knife, and me saying to come on out bitch as I leapt up and tried to grab his face off.
Things seemed to calm down when the bus partiers expressed more interest in partying than fighting and began to drive away, but as our “folk hero,” as EV Grieve calls him, followed the bus down the street, a renewed interest in battle resulted in further combat:
A half drunk can of beer came whizzing by my head. I followed the bus on foot, opened a recycle bin or two and pulled out some bottles, 32oz-ers I think, three of them, and I was running now. The bus thought about parking for a sec, and then decided to hightail it as they saw me running up behind them, except that the light was against them. They paused before running it as I hurled bottle #1 at their rear and as they floored it up the Bowery I hit them once again with #2.
Lest you think our folk hero has no regrets, he says he wishes he’d just asked them to move. But, after all, it was 4 a.m. And maybe this will dissuade others. EV Grieve’s commenters seem relatively supportive of the action.
The folk hero of East Fifth Street [EV Grieve]
This article from the Village Voice Archive was posted on May 17, 2011