I Don’t Go Clubbing, I Go Dancing: Your Guide To Partying Like It’s The Apocalypse


Hey guys, the rapture is upon us. And what’s a better way to greet the end of the world than with a dance party? Luckily, there are a bunch happening this weekend.

Small and sweaty dance floors are what you’ll find in Williamsburg tonight. The relatively quiet Coco 66 springs back to life with Nacht Music, a pick-me-up of disco, boogie, funk, soul; Legwarmers’ DJ BLT and resident DJ Niteline hold down the decks all night. Listen to BLT’s appearance on Let’s Get Serious to as a warmup Free all night. Not too far away, Veronica People’s Club encourages more dance floor aerobics at their Let’s Work It Out fête. The project is a collaboration between TV Carnage and DJ Teenwolf (formerly of Ninjasonik) and aims to rediscover “lost workout culture.” The result is a music/video mashup that celebrates ’80s and ’90s icons amid a soundtrack of “psychotic-disco-break-beat-funk, mixed with workout chants, psychedelic synths and irreverent bodybuilding nonsense.” (Check out their video clip for “Reaching For the Light”, complete with plenty of creepy OJ Simpson samples, to get an idea.) DJ Teenwolf and friends spin through the night–expect a mix of era-friendly dance anthems, raps, club, and other bangers. Free.

If you’re staying city-side, head to Santos for Feel Good with Tony Touch. The club has been seriously lacking in mainstream-friendly dance nights since Just Blaze and DJ Soul’s Re-Opened left the venue a few months back, and it looks like this might be new Friday night solution. Stretch Armstrong is the special guest, and to be honest, it’s hard to say which way this party will lean as a result. Though Armstrong and Touch are known as iconic DJs in the New York hip-hop scene, both have recently leaned toward house and disco, Armstrong with his electronic label Plant Music and Touch through his Latin house nights at Sullivan Room and beyond. Hopefully we’ll get some of it all. (If you’re not quite sold, stream the party online until you make up your mind.) $10 before midnight, more after. Get there early. If you’re looking for something a little more centralized, try the Hot Music fete at the Village’s Cayenne. Resident DJ Moma plays a mix of funk, soul, hip-hop, rnb, and even pop alongside tonight’s guests Rok One and LA’s Morse Code and hostess Promise Smith (who you’ll probably recognize from CV or Don Hill’s). There’s no cover, but we’ll warn you that drinks are pretty expensive. Hit up the Village dives on your way over, because this trio will make it very hard to leave once you make it in.

The dives have plenty to keep you occupied with as well. Tonight, the East Village’s disco/dub hang Nublu plays host to their first edition of Give The Drummer Some. The free party’s name takes inspiration from a Nikodemus track featuring Real Live Show, who are residents for the monthly get-down; it’ll showcase a different drummer or mixtape collaborator with live performances that will inevitably turn into a dance party. Tonight’s inaugural celebration features Malik Work and Kim Thompson (who has infamously worked with Beyonce and Kenny Barron) performing tracks off their Hot Right Now mixtape. Other performances include songstresses Vandana Jain and Jen Dale alongside a set by DJ Toni K. But if you’re looking for a good ol’ jukebox-styled dive party, we’ll direct you to Arrow Bar for the kick-off of the new monthly Total Dang. We’ll admit that we’re biased, as our favorites Phi Unit and Cousin Cole are on turntable duties tonight and will undoubtedly play some mix of hip-hop, rock, mainstream-friendly disco, and club. Not to mention that they’re the type of guys who remix our favorite pop songs into tracks that our hip DJ friends aren’t afraid to play; please listen immediately to Cousin Cole’s remix of “Rolling In the Deep” and Phi Unit’s remix of “Home”. And if you make it to 4 a.m., feel free to join them as they embrace the rapture and “take the party to St. Mark’s Church for Total Confessions.”

Dance music dominates Saturday’s agenda and a Brooklyn warehouse is where to go to get it. The highlight for us is a second Mister Saturday Night and Spank collaboration: New York, Just Like I Pictured It at the 12 Turn 13 loft space. The two veteran loft-fiending parties have teamed up to try and throw a party as diverse in attendance as it is in the music being spun. Party residents DJs Sean B, Will Automagic, Justin Carter, and Eamon Harkin are likely to play a mix of house, disco, soulful dance anthems, and boogie–and probably some tropical jams–to hold over their very, very friendly dance floor. Tickets are $5 before 11, $10 in advance, $15 at the door. The last one was epic, so we’ll suggest you make it there before the 1 a.m. rush (and resulting line). For something a little more intimate, head over to Cameo Gallery for a post-Terminal 5 show DJ set by School of Seven Bells; also featured is a live performance by 1Halftone’s Diamond Black Hearted Boy and DJ sets by Vice’s Thalia Mavros and ISO50’s Heathered Pearls. And get this, each act will be projecting a movie onto the wall as an accompaniment for their performance. (Ten bucks says SOSB chooses The Neverending Story or the Labyrinth. Oh, Williamsburg.) Tickets are $5 at the door.

If it’s a rave you’re after, head to South Brooklyn’s Electric Warehouse for their three-room Massive. NY’s glowstick-toting party promoters GBH team up with Bass Fueled Mischief for a lineup that includes electro-fiends Designer Drugs, the bass and dubstep influenced Hellfire Machina and Proper Villains, and jungle/dnb kings DJ Dara and Adam F. The night also features sets by Reckles, Crisis Kid, and Atom C. While we’re sure the night will be heavy on jungle, tech-house, ravey club tunes, garage, and dubstep, we’ll recommend the smaller acts to the night’s headliners, if only to help you maintain your sanity amid the smoke machines and light shows. (That and we want you to hear Proper Villains play their “Release The Hounds”.) Tickets are $15 before midnight with RSVP, and more after. Considering this thing is bound to go well into the afterhours, we’re fairly certain you’ll be able to negotiate your way in for about the same or less come 4 a.m.