You didn’t think I’d let the ladies get all the glory to themselves, did you?
Your choices are as follows:
*Robin Williams in Patch Adams
Granted, the material was syrupy to the point of vomit-inducing, but he didn’t have to go along with it so eagerly, did he?
*John Wayne in The Greatest Story Ever Told
I love the Duke, but he was a bit absurd playing a Roman centurion supervising the crucifixion.
“Truly, here is the son of God.” I don’t think so.
*Elvis Presley in Stay Away, Joe
I worship the King, but by playing an American Indian, he made even Change of Habit (with Elvis as a doctor and Mary Tyler Moore as a perky nun) look good by comparison. “How,” indeed.
*John Travolta in Battlefield Earth
An inflated yet weightless epic about what happens when “psychlos” conquer the earth, this was for Scientologists only. And with Travolta laying on the ham, most Jews couldn’t come even if they wanted to.
*Sylvester Stallone in Over the Top
A family drama about arm wrestling! It was over the top, all right — though Sly also scores points for Rambo, Rhinestone, Judge Dredd …
*Laurence Olivier in The Betsy
When the great are brought down, the thud is even louder and more upsetting, as happened when the great Olivier deigned to spice up this adaptation of a Harold Robbins trash novel about a car manufacturing dynasty.
Why, Sir Laurence, why?