A group called New Yorkers for Parks has come out with their annual report rating New York City’s beaches. The beaches are graded on a scale of 0-100 on criteria like drinking fountains, bathrooms, pathways, and shoreline. This year, Staten Island came in first with South Beach, which scored a 99! And Staten Island, bless its heart, also came in last with the “unsatisfactory” Wolfe’s Pond Beach.
At least Wolfe’s Pond doesn’t have the worst bathrooms — that dubious honor belongs to Coney Island (which, if you’ve ever seen those bathrooms, is spot-on). Wolfe’s Pond is apparently pretty gross, though: “All of the sections randomly selected for the survey were strewn with excessive litter or large natural debris,” according to the report. It also quotes a man named Sol saying “Some days it’s clean, other days it’s not. There are lots of big pieces of trash. God forbid a kid trips and falls.”
On the other hand, Staten Island has the almost-perfect-scoring South Beach, its name reminiscent of Florida, its bathrooms “free of damage” and possessing “eclectic design elements.” A man named Peter told the report people, “I go to South Beach in Staten Island, and I find it very clean and not too crowded. Who needs the Jersey Shore?” Who needs the Jersey Shore, indeed.
[via Animal NY]