Phillipe Blond’s Bodacious Birthday Bash


Phillipe Blond (of the designing duo the Blonds) celebrated his birthday last night at the “On Top” rooftop party at Le Bain, and though I never did find him, I had a hell of a time running up and down between the chlorine-y Jacuzzi floor and the soigné roof looking for him.

The people were gorgeous and all sporting some kind of unicorn motif or other, either because it’s a Blonds icon or the earthquake had cracked their brains wide open.

“Where’s Phillipe?” I asked someone in the know.

“He’ll probably do a change and then get here later,” he responded. “My guess is they’re drinking.”

But there was drinking here, too!

Oh, well. While waiting, I managed a fun trip to the crepe stand on the roof, where I could watch other people down their Nutella and banana crepes while they crouched, hoping not to be seen doing something so gauche as eating.

And suddenly I was in a corner, surrounded by the busty trio of Dianne Brill, Anita Sarko, and Christina Via.

When we were grouped for a photo, I could barely be seen from under that mass of boobs and hair. “At least it’s not hairy balls,” said Via.

Just then, Brill gave me one of her products to lather on my face the next next morning — a moisturizer made of snake venom and apples. Hey, that would make a great crepe!

And with that, we decided to start a Jewish Google called

I ran up and down a few more times and saw Susanne Bartsch dancing on the bar, a girl with a squeaky voice saying she’s on Russian Dolls but doesn’t have a TV to watch it, and a gal with a hat and attitude who kept grabbing me, prompting me to scream, “No touching!”

I never did see Phillipe, though. Happy birthday, baby.