God And Jesus Did Really Well At The VMAs


They were the two most thanked deities at last night’s MTV music honors, making me wonder if the Holy Spirit is working on getting itself a new agent.

Dame Britney Spears thanked God for her pop-video honor, as I pictured Him sitting up there going, “Note to self: Make sure aging pop tart cops a moon man. Then back to creating earthquakes and storms.”

Most devout of all was too-skinny Justin Bieber dedicating his trophy “not only to God, but to Jesus because I wouldn’t have been here without him. He put me in this position.”

No, dear, that was Usher — and let’s not even talk about what position that is, ba dum pum!

Anyway, when Cloris Leachman delightfully admitted that she’s DTF, it took the icky sanctimonious taste out of the air and restored the kind of down-to-the-gut crassness that has always made rock and roll a heavenly experience.

Inspiringly, it was the oldest one there (yes, she’s several months older than Tony Bennett) who reintroduced some realness to the occasion.