My name is Bob, and I’m a chocoholic.
Café-Tasse on the left, Bug Bites on the right
I am part of the 10 percent of the population that classifies itself as chocoholic. Of that 10 percent, nine-tenths are thought to be women. (Note to self: What a great way to meet females!)
As a chocoholic, I am prey to crass blandishments and commercial come-ons. When I see those tiny chocolates by the cash register, I know they have been put there to lure me. I know that they’re an awful bargain, way more expensive ounce for ounce than a real chocolate bar. Yet I’m powerless to resist. Even if I came up to the register with my mouth stuffed with chocolate, I’d have to buy it anyway, just because it feels so good to buy chocolate.
Here are a couple of samples I picked up lately. Some day doing this will send me to the poorhouse. The one on the left (75 cents), made in Belgian and weighing in at 0.31 ounces, is called Café-Tasse, and boasts 77 percent cacao. It’s smooth on the tongue and has undergone a real European milling. (Americans tend to mill their chocolate less time in the conch.)
The one on the right (69 cents) comes with a political plus. It’s called Bug Bites and it’s manufactured for a company called Endangered Species Chocolate, based in Indianapolis. The bar is covered with slogans and buzzwords, including “100% Ethically Traded,” “Certified Organic by Oregon Tilth,” “Gluten Free,” and “Vegan.” The website assures us in un-proofread English that “10% of net profits from each piece of chocolate your purchase from Endangered Species Chocolate goes back to partners that are affecting global positive change on their own ways.” The bar weighs in at 0.35 ounces, and the percent cacao is not revealed. Once again according to the website, the chocolate originates in Ecuador and the Ivory Coast.
Next: The Winner …
The Café-Tasse is imperially smooth and rich, with a shiny sheen that suggests careful manufacture. The Bug Bites is a little bit chalky and coarse, but still filled with a flavor that blooms a few milliseconds after you start chewing. Both are totally edible, but the winner is …
Café-Tasse Extra Noir.
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