News & Politics

Greenpoint Raccoons Are Going Next Level


Before occupying Wall Street, before bedbugs, before the summer of the rat, there were vicious raccoons, who would just as soon swing into your garden and destroy it, or come in through your window (and, somehow, manage to decapitate themselves in a suicide mission within your kitchen cabinets) as they would look at you. Now, via New York Shitty, the raccoons are back. And they want to look at you, creepily, through your window! They are everywhere! They are terrifying.

A woman named Sophia, who lives in Greenpoint, sent in the photo above to Miss Heather with a note:

Im not sure how news worthy this is, but last night around 2am not one, not two, but three raccoons were milling around on the deck of my backyard! They seemed very unafraid of coming so close to the house, and ended up coming right up to the glass and looking in, basically having a staring contest of sorts with my cat through the backyard door. Even turning on the deck light to get a better view did not seem to phase them. I admit it was pretty entertaining, but the damage they did to some flower beds and plants in our pond makes it a little less so. Im wondering if anyone else has spotted these fellows, i know raccoons have been seen in Greenpoint before, but this fearless crew seemed to step it up to the next level.

Miss Heather soothingly points out that raccoons and Greenpoint have gotten along together for a long time, and we will hope that continues to be the case. Some raccoons are even cute, while others creepily stare at you through the window. The thing about raccoons, though, is, you don’t choose them. They choose YOU. They choose YOU, Sophia.

From The New York Shitty Inbox: Raccoons In Greenpoint? [New York Shitty]

[JDoll / @thisisjendoll]

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