Billy Elliot, Priscilla, and Sister Act have carried on the time-honored tradition of turning popular movies into musicals.
I’ll tell you:
The adaptation — titled Crazy Bitch: The Musical — will feature a well-chosen bunch of Sondheim chestnuts (“You said you loved me … Or am I losing my mind?” “Nothing’s gonna harm you, not while I’m around”). Julie Taymor provides the rabbit.
*Driving Miss Daisy
They’ll retool this heartbreaking classic to make it more family-friendly, complete with sumptuous special effects. The new title? Daisy Daisy Bang Bang. Daisy and Hoke bond while flying 60 feet in the air!
*The Big Chill
This will be scaled-down for the recession and called The Little Chill. Three friends reunite to sing and dance and play their own instruments. Actually, one person will play all three characters, who will never be seen in the same room.
A touching romp about the dark side of history, with songs by Gilbert and Sullivan (“I’ve Got a Little List, “Never Mind the Why and Wherefore”). Mel Gibson stars — as Hitler.
The Oscar-winning Best Picture will be transformed into a Busby Berkeley-style musical with Norbert Leo Butz singing “Life is like a box of chocolates” to the tune of “Life Is Just a Bowl of Cherries.” Other songs include “My Name’s Forrest Gump, People Call Me Forrest Gump,” “Bubba’s Megamix,” and “Shrimp Boat’s Comin’!”
*Dances With Wolves
And I mean dances and more dances! This will be the most choreographed western since Oklahoma! Julie Taymor provides the wolves.