Quickie Q&A With Krystal Something-Something


Krystal Something-Something — the Ohio-born host at Splash Bar and Glammy nominee for Best Dressed — won’t leave the house unless her looks can kill.

It turns out she has something-something to say, too. Here’s our talk:

How did you create your persona?

One night while I was standing on my lanai, “Krystal” popped into my head. I decided I wanted to be “Krystal” … something, something. And then it hit me! I want to be a superstar, the poster child for a new generation of artists, the director of a Backspace Broadway show, the subject of a series of trading cards, an inspiration, an icon, a pizza restaurant owner, and I’d like to use my fame to meet Raven Symone.

Stand in line, hon! What’s been your wildest outfit?

My wildest outfit ever was my most normal outfit ever. I was a “Fishy Drag Queen. ” I did a run-of-the-mill feminine look. I had long hair, simple makeup, a black cocktail dress, slutty pumps, and my tits were taped up to the gods. It was so normal it was shocking! For ME, this was crazy weird, and it was the first time lots of people had no idea who I was.

Fab — but don’t ever do that again! What’s been your wildest night on the town so far?

I don’t think I’ve had my “craziest night on the town” yet. But when I do, I’m sure it will involve lots of Sauza, a killer tave, and a Stephanie Tanner impersonator!

And no doubt meeting Raven Symone. Mwah.

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