Hollywood Whores Audition Notice: Let’s Cast It


Kirstie Alley may be coming to Broadway in a Lance Bass-produced play called The Fabulous Lies of Hollywood Whores, according to the TimesPatrick Healy.

If everything works out, Kirstie would play “The Pimp,” a lady with an upscale escort service that’s run out of a department store, but hey, the other parts are up for grabs.

Here’s the casting notice from Playbill.

And here are my ideas for who should play what:

For “The Whore” (Man, late 20s. Top male escort in town.)

Justin Timberlake. He’s Lance’s ex-fellow-boy-bander, after all.

For “The D-Lister” (Woman, late 20s, early 30s).

Lindsay Lohan. She’s 25, but definitely looks late 20s, early 30s.

For the multiple roles of “The E.T. Reporter/Ivana/Himalolah”

Rising star Nina Arianda. Just try and stop her.

And for “The Superstar” (Man, late 20s, early 30s).

Ryan Gosling. He can definitely pull it off — and hopefully take it off.

You’re welcome, Lance.

Thanks to for the tip.

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