Rob Delaney Tells the Voice Why He’s Suing Kim Kardashian


As we noted a little while ago, comedian Rob Delaney is suing Kim Kardashian and some of her corporate overlords in the wake of her divorce from Kris Humphries after a measly 72 days of marriage. The co-defendants are Kardashian, Ryan Seacrest, E!, and Comcast. Delaney is serious about this.

We just got him on the phone for a few minutes to talk about his new initiative.

The plan:
I’m going to sue her and Ryan Seacrest [ed. note: Seacrest produces Kardashian’s shows], and Comcast and E!. It’s important to sue them all I think.

How much he’s suing them for:
Just $18 million. I don’t fault her her income from the regular shows and stuff, the $18 million is just the income from the wedding shows. She’ll have to give it back, and she’ll give it to me, and I’ll give it to my uncle.

He’s a terrible guy. I think that he would spend the money better than she could. Obviously he’ll spend it terribly, but it’ll be symbolic to give it to him: this is what we think of you, Kim, and we think your money would be better spent given to a multiple-convicted sex offender who sells prescription drugs to old people who don’t even need them, they’re just trying to get high. That’s my opinion. I’m not saying “hey I’m right,” I don’t mean to get up on a pulpit.

Why he’s doing it:

It’s egregious. If you’re going to get paid that much, you can stick it out for a little while longer. They have over 70 Kardashian shows; If they’re going to foist that on us and involve us in that commitment, if I’m a guest at their wedding, then they need to stick it out. Put in the time. It’s not like you have to live together, my God. Just fake it for us for a little bit.

Does Kim know about it?

With the number of times that this has been mentioned on Twitter, it’s certainly possible that she’s aware of it. I wrote a letter to Katy Perry recently, though I don’t know if that ever got in front of her. I’m a comedian so I know some celebrities, but I don’t know anybody at that level of incandescent godlike fame. So she hasn’t responded yet.

I tried to get it escalated by the court so she’d have to respond today, but it didn’t happen. I can’t change the law but I can aim the law at whomever I want.

On his legal team:

I’m representing myself and the people of the United States of America if they’ll have me. I went to the O.W. Coburn School of Law and then I went to Oral Roberts University. Both are the same schools that tax attorney and presidential candidate Michele Bachmann went to. At those schools we learned that you can use the law for whatever you want.

Who he thinks is the worst offender in the entire affair:
It could be us. It could be you and I on the phone right now, not standing up and saying “I won’t take this anymore.” Kim Kardashian is just a person, but she’s hidden behind this mechanism of publicity and PR and lawyers and really, the onus is on us to stand up and say I’m not gonna feed you anymore. I’m not gonna give you anymore of my money. She’s like a shark, and when I say “she” I mean the corporations that produced her. They’re like sharks, they see sea lions and they’re gonna eat them. If you and I recognize that this is happening, we have to stand up and say no.

I’m not angry at Kim personally. I’m just saying let’s wake up, America. We don’t need this. There was always garbage, but it remains our responsibility to fight it. It’s up to us what we support and want to have continue. That’s our sacred duty, we owe that to each other. I owe it to you, Rosie. I expect that you would do the same.

We’re watching this case with interest and will update as it develops. Meanwhile, Kris and Kim are still over :(.